And they’re back. After a break of 16 weeks, our parliamentarians have returned to the national capital, and consequently, your humble commentator has also returned to commentate on the glorious events unfolding in the world’s biggest temple of democracy. Too fancy? Clearly, you haven’t been listening to the stuff the members of Parliament have been saying.

If the first three days of activity in both houses of Parliament are any indication, the Winter session is going to be a festival of outrage.

Opposition be like:

On November 16, Parliament resumed and Lok Sabha adjourned. Only the Rajya Sabha functioned for a day and demonetization dominated the discourse. Interesting tidbits from the debate, coming right up. However, we need to talk about what is not happening because of the ongoing chaos.

Parliament Resumes, Lok Sabha Adjourns

Guess how long it took for Lok Sabha to be adjourned on November 16? Ten minutes.

Everyone watching must be like, “What?! Why do these politicians keep disrupting the house? Why don’t these people want to work?”

Well, they do (sort of), but this time, they couldn’t help it.

The adjournment was to pay respects to a sitting member of Parliament who passed away. Smt Renuka Sinha of the Trinamool Congress of Cooch Bihar constituency in West Bengal died on August 18 (#RIP). Here is here performance record as an MP.

It’s a followed practice that in case of the death of a sitting member, Parliament will not transact any business on the first day of sitting as a mark of respect. In case an MP dies while the Parliament is in session, the house is adjourned the following day.

For example, in the Budget session, PA Sangma passed away and a similar adjournment followed. His son, Conrad Sangma, now occupies his seat (from Tura, Meghalaya). The first order of business for the session in Lok Sabha was his swearing in.

Interestingly, in May 2016, Rajya Sabha decided to curtail this practice. The upper house will now only adjourn if an MP dies during sessions. Lok Sabha, though, is sticking to tradition.

Demonetization: Opposition releases the Kraken!

A mortal human appeared on television and declared that 86 per cent of the currency in circulation was no longer of any value, and everybody lost their mind. Such power, much wow.

The chaos following demonetisation is still unfolding across the country and Parliament reflected that sentiment. I personally think, despite the horrible implementation of this grand idea, it just MIGHT benefit us common citizens in the long term (I have written about it here). It’s a move that is affecting each and every one of us.

If you’re less optimistic, it *might* fail. In which case, we’re probably going to be goners. No wonder then that the Opposition went bonkers.

While some MPs chose to attack the government on the technicalities and nitty-grittty of demonetization, some just voiced the frustration of the public. Or something like that.

Opposition MPs filed multiple adjournment notices in Rajya Sabha. Derek O’Brien of Trinamool Congress insisted that the names of members be read out by the speaker in the order of submission.

The speaker obliged:

After that fact was put on record, like a person commenting “FIRST!” on a popular Youtube channel, Mr O’Brien had another tiny request.

Smooth Mr O’Brien. Very smooth. And then he walked out to join Mamata Banerjee’s protest march to the Rashtrapati Bhavan.

Mr Anand Sharma of the Indian National Congress gave a decent speech lobbing a lot of scathing attacks. Piyush Goyal gave an equally good retort on the Bharatiya Janata Party’s behalf. Deputy Speaker had to interject in a bunch of places and calm rising tempers, especially when Goyal praised the Prime Minister.

Upcoming elections were also mentioned every now and then in a “WE WILL SEE WHAT HAPPENS ONLY!” tone.

Throughout this demonetization ordeal, the public has been made to believe that this decision was taken by the Prime Minister and it was done in utter secrecy. Turns out, the PM was not the one who came up with the idea or took the decision. Read what slipped out of Goyal.

Then came along Sharad Yadav of Janata Dal United. He had much to say. At one point, he insinuated that the Finance Minister was not aware of the decision because if he were, he would have told Yadav.

In all this, the one thing that did become clear was that nobody really knew how this decision was taken. There are only multiple theories, and a true mystery.

Another speech worth mentioning was that of Sitaram Yechury. He had done his homework and attacked the government in the most efficient way. (*Braces self for all the “YOU COMMIE LIBTARD” comments*) Do give his speech a listen.

Also, bonus: notice how Sharad Yadav interjects every once in a while to raise the bar of… um…  entertainment?

Lok Sabha: Another cost of demonetisation

#ADJOURNED!

Period.

While Parliament bickers over demonetisation, an important bill is listed for consideration in the Lok Sabha: The Maternity Benefit (Amendment) Bill, 2016. It was passed in the Rajya Sabha practically without any discussion in the last session and is slated to be discussed in the Lok Sabha (if it functions).

This bill proposes three major things:
1) Increase the current maternity leave allowance from 12 weeks to 26 weeks

2) Make it compulsory for organisations, that employ more than 50 people, to have a creche in the premises

3) Work-from-home facilities for working mothers wherever possible.

The proposed legislation also makes is mandatory for every organisation to inform women employees about these provisions at the time of employment. Women who adopt children under three months would come under the purview of legal maternity benefits.

If only the Parliament would function and get over demonetisation – stop asking for a “roll back”. It’s neither pragmatic nor happening – we can get with the programme and pass legislations like this one. The effective implementation of demonetisation is up to the government and the Reserve Bank of India. Technically, it has nothing to do with the Parliament, technically. Sure, if our representatives want to express concern, then they should. If they have suggestions, then they should give them. Using Parliament to score political brownie points, however, is just tiresome (especially since we’ve all heard most of these objections and suggestions already… on Twitter, for example).

Despite that, if our representatives want to express their concerns, DO IT. It’s time to discuss the demonetization problem, give suggestions and then move on. Get on with our respective jobs instead of trying to score political brownie points. There are important topics of discussion on the Parliamentary agenda. Like maternity benefits, mental healthcare and a new education policy, for instance.

It’s to raise and debate issues like these that our parliamentarians spend these weeks in Delhi, spending the tax payers’ money. And hell, if they don’t get over demonetisation, not only are parliamentarians not doing their job, WHAT WILL I WRITE ABOUT IN MY COLUMN NEXT WEEK DAMMIT?